What is the deal with.....?

...these ladies that go into a public restroom and start undoing their pants before they get into the stall?? Um, ewwww! And, like, HELLO!! piss all over the seat!!?? What the hell is that?? Males, I understand. They have to take aim and try to shoot straight. Ladies, if you paper and sit on the seat as mother nature made us then you wouldn't miss! Why would you hover anyway?? STUPID PEOPLE!!

"This is our only bathroom,
We try to keep it neat.
So please be kind
To the next behind
And don't mess up the seat!"

Early Morning...

What a wild week. I took a little time off to be with the boys and I finally got my fill of them! Thursday I picked up a friend of theirs and we took a picnic to the park. It was hot but tolerable in the shade so we found a table and ate and chatted and then pulled out the squirt guns! We had a blast! What got me was when we went to the store later for drinks they just picked and squabbled and ran around like a bunch of 5 year olds and by the end of the day I was ready for a break. I miss that! We were going to drive out to Wilmington where the kids' other friend Chris moved and bring him back here for a couple days but we can't get hold of him so we might just go to the beach instead. Break my heart...poor me...I have to go the beach...note the touch of sarcasm! ha!
Well it's 5am and I think I'm finally getting sleepy again. I had a nasty little hot flash that woke me up at 1 and again at 3. Either that or it's summer time and really is hot in here! We have to go out sometime this weekend and pick up a little window unit for Jason's room. Poor kid is sleeping on the sofa. Usually we just put both boys in Alex's room (I catch Alex with his AC on in the winter sometimes... he's just like Matt in that way...drives me crazy!) but they're finally too big for that. Alex will be 16 next Sunday and Jason is 14. Where does the time go?

Good morning!

I've been up since 3am. I changed my settings so you can all add comments if you like...I think. That's what I meant to do anyway. We'll see if it works.
I guess it's a slow news day...nothing much new to report. Better than drama. I have taken a couple of days off to spend time with the boys which has been nice. Alex is trying to get together a game of "Mario RPG" which is kind of like Dungeons and Dragons on using characters from Super Mario Brothers. I'm a bean-person magical healer. I'll write more as I learn about it.
I think I'm finally getting sleepy again so I'll write more when I get up. Ciao y'all.

Excerpt from "What would Barbie look like naked?"

What would Barbie look like naked? Admit it: you've wondered, too. Everyone has fantasized about Barbie nude. If you haven't, then you're the weirdo, not the rest of us. The Pope has fantasized about fully nude Barbie. Who can help it? From fashion selection to vintage collection, she's everything! Barbie! Unfortunately, she's a toy. Do you remember the first time you discovered that none of her good parts were drawn in? It looks like she's wearing a flesh-colored bodysuit.
Hey: I pay for the full Barbie experience, I want the full Barbie experience. I made the following prank call to Mattel to get the skinny.


MATTEL: Thank you for calling Mattel. This is Leslie, how can I help you?

HARGRAVE: I have a complaint about a Barbie doll.

MATTEL: OK, I can help you with that. Can you tell me the product number you have?

HARGRAVE: It's the Happy Birthday Barbie Doll.

MATTEL: And what's the problem with the doll?

HARGRAVE: I got her home and disrobed her, only to find out her body is just smooth molded plastic.

MATTEL: [Pause] Her body is smooth molded plastic.

HARGRAVE: And I read that she was supposed to be "anatomically correct."

MATTEL: No. I'm sorry sir, we don't make anatomically correct dolls.

HARGRAVE: She looks like a hood ornament. And I was disappointed, because I don't know how young girls are supposed to learn about the female figure from this toy. Do you know what I mean, Leslie?

MATTEL: No sir. I don't have a clue. I'll be glad to pass your concerns along, though.

HARGRAVE: Are you going to send me a Barbie that is truly anatomically correct?

MATTEL: No sir. As I mentioned to you, we don't make an anatomically correct doll.

HARGRAVE: Would you consider making one in the future?

MATTEL:N o sir.

HARGRAVE: Don't you make customized Barbies?

MATTEL: No we don't, sir.

HARGRAVE: I think you do sell personalized Barbies.

MATTEL: We used to have a doll you designed yourself on the Internet, and that doll is no
longer available.

HARGRAVE: Have you ever seen a nude woman?

MATTEL: Pardon me, sir?HARGRAVE: I said, if you've ever seen a nude woman, their anatomy does not look like this! There are markings, and hair, and other discolorations!

MATTEL: [Pause] Well sir, I'll be glad to pass your comments along.

HARGRAVE: So you don't sell one with the breasts and genitals drawn in properly.

MATTEL: No sir, we do not.

HARGRAVE: Do you think one of your factory workers would be able to draw them in with a Sharpie?

MATTEL: No sir, we won't be willing to do that for you.HARGRAVE: Please?

MATTEL: No sir.

HARGRAVE: She is so pretty. She would be even prettier with all three holes. That's all I'm saying.

MATTEL: [Complete silence]HARGRAVE: Listen, Leslie. She has pretty blond hair.

MATTEL: Sir, I can't help you anymore. And I'm going to disconnect this call now.

HARGRAVE: If I were to trim just a bit of her luxuriant hair, and delicately glue it to her pubic region, would that be OK with you?

MATTEL: Sir, I'm going to disconnect this call right now. Goodbye.

Then she disconnected me. Very disappointed in Mattel. I didn't even get to the questions about Ken, and his lack of a man-dong.You know, someone should try to make a man-dong for Ken. And that someone should be me.

Pic

This is my English friend Sheila, me, my new friends Susie and Eric, on my whirl-wind wonderful trip to Florida!
....I'm the cute one! tee hee! :)

Ahhhhhhhhh...

Coffee! mmmmm! Good morning all! It's going to be a wonderful day....just because I said so! I'm off in a bit to get my toes pampered and then off to work which I'm simply NOT going to let the a-holes of the world bother me! SO THERE!
(I'm stifling my whiny self that desperately wants to say, "Why can't I get a job that doesn't include dealing with a-holes!!!! Waaaaah!)
Anyway I'm just going to sit here and enjoy my lovely coffee and concentrate on creating and affecting my day in a positive way.
Fun news! Last night Jason said to Alex, "There's something eating the cat food. It looks like a rat!" Turns out it was Franklin, our baby oppossum that lives under the house. He's such a darling! We call him Franklin for 2 reasons. 1) when I was a teen in San Diego we had a huge oppossum that hung around the house call Benjamin, named after Benjamin Franklin. Well, I couldn't very well call him Benjamin again (for another 2 reasons*) so Franklin works well which brings me to: 2) Matty's middle name is Franklin. Once I figure out how to get the pic from the camera to the computer I'll post it.
(*I don't like using a first name as a first name twice and I had a boyfriend named Benjamin who broke my heart so that just will not do!)
Well, all, have a superfantabulous day and don't let the a*holes of the world get you down... again, because I said so! CIAO :)

My second post

Good morning, y'all. Hope everyone slept well. Good news on the homefront! I'm going to be an aunt again! I told my baby bro last night we know what causes that. His response? "Water." Remind me to take my own bottled water when I go to visit!

Other good news is that many of you know my mom has been struggling with mental illness and homelessness the last several years. She's finally in a place that will allow her some semblance of freedom, constant meals, and someone to watch her take her meds. I'm very relieved.

Have a great day! :)

Kari's First Post

Hello everyone. Not much time to post for my first blog as I have to get ready to go to work. joy. Just wanted to get something up. Hope all is well for everyone.